Why I’m a Bully and So are You!

Last week I came across this picture below from Lisa Bevere’s Instagram.


I shared it on my social media pages and it received quite a bit of attention. I believe it did so because truth is we can all relate to it.

Whether you realize it or not, we have at least 65,000 thoughts per day and sixty-five percent of them are negative.

Can you imagine how much of that sixty-five percent is negative towards ourselves?

I imagine it’s a good amount but we tend to not be aware of the negative things we are saying about ourselves rather the negative things others are saying about us.

But truth be told we are our biggest critic – Women and Men!

As the picture says above, we really deserve to give ourselves an apology.  


1.  Jesus died for your sins and by you continuing to remind yourself of them denies what Jesus did for you on the cross.

2.  Jesus’ death and resurrection provided you a new life in Him when you received Him in your life therefore there is no longer any condemnation. (Romans 8:1) 

WOW 11

3.  Others are watching you – children, grandchildren, co-workers, teachers, neighbors – do life in Christ Jesus therefore grace and forgiveness is your song not disgrace and hatred.

4.  Your worth – your confidence – your purpose is tied up in who God sees you as not the world. God wants to use your life to Glorify Him and bring purpose and meaning to it.  He can’t accomplish that when you are beating yourself up.  God said,”build yourself up!!”

Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. (Eph 4:29)

Who is hearing your words – your thoughts?  You are! Therefore use words to build yourself up.

So how do you go from a Bully to a Builder?

1.  Begin listening to yourself – Make a conscious effort to listen and be aware of your thoughts and what comes out of your mouth.  Take note of each negative statement and thought about yourself by writing down each one on a notepad just for one day.  Then, review it and tear it up or burn it.

2.  Forgive yourself – This is a crucial step to stop being a bully and begin living in the freedom and peace from our Savior Jesus Christ.  You can do this anywhere and I encourage you to find a space and time that allows you to be alone – just you and God.  Then pray and allow God to speak into your heart and heal those wounds.

3.  Replace the lies with God’s truth – God says much about who you are in Him.  To begin to believe those truths, you want to be speaking them over yourself.  There is much power in our words when spoken in the name of Jesus.  Let me encourage you to go to the very inspiring and courageous Michele Cushatt’s website for a free download called “God’s Word Over You.”

So now let’s move forward by making an agreement right here and right now, you and me!

I agree to become aware of how I bully myself and begin moving forward towards how God sees me.  Also, I will track my wins by acknowledging where I honored God, myself and others each day.  I will do this by writing it on a piece of paper and placing it in a jar.  At the end of the month, I will take them out and read them so I can replace those negative stories with evidence of my life lived for Jesus.

If you agree with the above statement and are willing to make this shift in your life, then share, like, comment on this post or on social media.  Use the hashtag #HoweAwesome so we can hold each other up in prayer.

WOW Wins Jar

If we are not already connected, please let’s connect on Twitter and Instagram at @michelledhowe

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.